Tag: Pop Culture

Get back to your needlepoint, little starling. Craft, craft, craft…craft, craft, craft.

Reason 1,234,567 I can’t wait until the house is sold: I get to put up all my inappropriate decor.

I don’t have super-awesome stuff like electric chairs or cobras fighting mongooses, but I have plenty of off-kilter things and things that don’t get your house sold that we can’t have out right now (a homemade ALF planter I found at a flea market, Tom likes to display his big ol’ AT-AT from childhood, etc.),

With the rapid reduction of dog rescue work I do, I’ve found time to do things I used to do, like a little bit of crafting.

Over Thanksgiving weekend, I finally got to make what’s been bouncing around in my head for over five years. But, now it has to go in a box, waiting for a time when a cross-stitch inspired by Silence of the Lambs can be displayed in my bathroom without weirding out potential buyers, just regular visitors. So, for now, I will hang it in this blog post to enjoy.

Police Snackademy

You know when you spell a word over and over and it doesn’t seem like a word anymore?  And how sometimes something seems funny, then  you spell it over and over and it doesn’t seem like a funny anymore? This is that post. It’s pretty much solely to amuse Tom and my friend, Dave.

I’ve been sitting on it for weeks. Then, Lance goes and tweets about Steve Guttenberg getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame today. What the fucking hell? What are the chances of that? I’m sitting on a Police Academy post and Steve Guttenbeg “finally?” gets a star on the Walk of Fame. So, I have  no choice but to drop this bomb. I apologize to all who are scarred by it.

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We were at Walgreen’s, and Tom came across this amazing combo DVD of Police Academys 2 and 3 (yes, 2 and 3 only):

Notice the yellow sticker on it – “DON’T Forget SNACK.” Yep, it’s a yellow sticker about a singular snack. Even though there are TWO movies to watch – shouldn’t it be “snacks” plural? And also, stop nagging me, Comedy Double Feature Police Academy 2 and 3 DVD.

If I want a snack, I’ll get a snack, and if I don’t, I won’t. And, I’m not buying you anyway, so it’s none of your goddamned business.

I looked everywhere in the store, but they had none of my favorite snacks:

 

 

  

Pop Culture Haiku: John Travolta Tries to Make a Reservation at KFC and US Decides this is Newsworthy.

Dear US magazine,
there’s a special place in hell –
“Finger-lickin’ rude.”

Dear John Travolta,
KFC is not a place
where you need ressies.

 

More Punny TV Names – Because I Have a Serious Problem and Can’t Stop

I wrote a previous post about the groan-inducing titles of television shows that work a characters name in the title, sometimes with the clever grace of Gallagher’s mallet.

Here are five more titles that I think will inevitably end up on our television screen for our eye holes.

Connie Get a What What – An ASL teacher in the inner city tries to balance work, life, and keep her affair with the school principal a secret.

I Hear a Tiffany – Tiffany plays the flute in an orchestra by day or night, depending on the scheduled performances, and plays the “flute” as a porn actress by day or night, depending on the orchestra’s performances. There’s a lot of chaotic mad dashes between concert halls and studios, and changing clothes in the back of taxi cabs.

Drew Wrote the Book of Love – I am 100% confidant this will eventually be a Dr. Drew reality show.

A Dave in the Life – Dave Johnson is fresh out of college and has to move in with his aunt and uncle, Jodie and Stephen Life. Hijinks and generational misunderstandings ensue.

Supply and Da Man – Reggie “Supply” Jones, a notorious drug kingpin, ends up in prison and strikes up an unlikely friendship with the warden, Manny Moore.

Becky See, Becky Do – Becky has the uncanny ability to read Ikea assembly instructions and get it right the first time without any confusion. She becomes a millionaire helping others put together funny sounding furniture.

My punny show is “Carried Away,” what’s yours?