I was looking through a magazine and found this article:
Something didn’t sit right with me. I felt like I’d seen it before – that funnily exasperated eye roll and lip squinch. You know, the face all us ladies make when we just can’t get our act together! So I looked through the previous months’ magazines and there they all were. I knew I’d see it before:
Man, that lady must lead a busy life.
It’s why she’s so disorganized.
She can never find her guillotine because her face has FROZEN THAT WAY.
Our moms were right! I guess she needs to lift the bags up in front of her rolled eyes, but then she could get a liver in the face.
Women’s magazines are so dumb. Of course stolen kidneys smell sour, they are full of pee.
HA! You need to write for women’s magazines. I’m so tired of being misinformed about stolen organ freshness.
She needs a bigger bag, clearly.
More than one, too.
Definitely needs more than one bag. I think her expression is from wanting to grab the drug purse and accidentally taking the organs one.
Those are much harder to smoke if they haven;t been dried properly.
Yeah, I bet you’re right – she keeps grabbing the wrong bag.
*snicker* Love the post!
In other news – there is something about that broad’s face that makes me angry…. violent, almost. Curious if that was the intent? Subliminal and such? No? Huh.
Thanks! Whatever it is that you feel about that face is why it caught my eye, too.
Completely agree with you- I want to smack that damn weird smirky thing right off of her.
I tried that and it didn’t work and I got a paper cut.
If I was stealing organs I would have a suitcase. You can’t put that stuff in a purse silly it might get punctured. This level of business requires a briefcase.
I wish I had a sort of James Bond style briefcase for my makeup too, come to think of it. And a martini.
Really, for the organs, she needs a cooler, and then a briefcase for the money she makes from selling them.
I’m fascinated by her wee bag o’ torture devices. That’s okay, right?
I don’t think I’m the best person to answer that question. True story: searching Google images for all three categories is completely traumatizing.
True story:
My youngest daughters are obsessed with Selena Gomez. They found the same picture in 4 different magazines. My teenager rolled her eyes at their exasperation and asked “so, what does that tell you, girls?” They answered “that Selena Gomez really likes that picture of herself?”
btw, until I see that broad holding a Glad trash ban with that expression, I’ll calling her aphony.
She’ll look like that holding a trash bag when she inevitably has to throw away her spoiled organs.
I wonder if that lady ever gets her little bags mixed up.
All the time, I’m sure.
Ha! I love that you put “Valentine’s Day” in the bag of torture devices. Um, I mean that SHE did. Natch!
I definitely don’t think they are thinking big enough. I mean, what about my liquor bag? It’s hell to keep all those half empty bottles organized. Or my chocolate bag? How do I sort it . . . dark to white? Flavored? With nuts/candies/ lavender??
We may need an entire themed magazine with all this info. And on every page . . . that girl with that expression.
I think liquor bags are supposed to be brown and made of paper – but that still leads to a lot of confusion if you have multiple bottles.
The picture doesn’t compute with the story! She has an “Oops, I farted” look on her face!
“And I think I may like the smell of it.”
I’m just sitting here holding my giant rotund belly and laughing and laughing and laughing at your post AND all the comments. I liked the valentines day thing, too. You clever little monkey.
Thanks! Hopefully that belly you’re holding still has all its organs.
Maybe Mary Poppins can help her with her handbag?
I wish I were Mary Poppins, but I wouldn’t want to have to babysit kids.
That reminds me- I need a new bong. Oh, and a new liver.
Just be sure you have a place for everything and everything has a place.
This is SO many kinds of rad!!!! 🙂 Thanks, this made my day. I should really catch up on blog reading more often… 😉
Thanks, Venus! I hope you’re feeling better.
I really needed this today! I can never seem to keep track of those pesky stolen organs.
Honestly, thanks for this. Seriously inspired work. Especially the tee-tiny little torture devices. (Geeenius!)
Thanks! Wouldn’t teeny torture devices be so cute? Barbies could use them.