Christmas Craft: Humane Rat’s Nest Ornament

While shopping online, I found this ornament:
It’s a ball of “exotic fur” that would go on your Christmas tree because we haven’t found enough things to make out of dead animals.

But, what if you don’t have $36 for whatever the hell that thing is, and want something like it? That’s what I’m here for.

I’ve come up with two humane ways to reproduce this glorious holiday accessory for little to no money. The chinchillas and/or rats will thank you for your willingness to craft equally beautiful hair-related ornaments.

Project 1: I Just Got My Hair Cut Ornament

Supplies: 1. Lint roller   2. Hair

1. Go get your hair cut.
2.  Have the following conversation with the nice lady at the salon:
You (bending down with a plastic bag): I’m taking my hair. It’s, uh, for a project.
Lady: Oh! Ok. Is it for your garden?
You: ………………………………………yes.
Pray that you do not open up a conversation about gardens and hair because you kinda heard that once but have no idea about the details of why people put hair in gardens.
3.    Have the hair sit around your house in a bag on the kitchen counter because you are a big procrastinating freak.
4.    Spread hair out onto a white paper towel.
5.    Roll lint roller around in it.
6.    Tie a piece of rope to the convenient hole in the handle.
7.   Voila! You have a festive, humane ornament with goddamn hair on it, just like you always wanted.

Project 2: Celebrity “Hair” Ornament

Supplies: 1. Lint roller    2. Print out of pictures of a celebrity whose hair will work for this project. 3. Optional festive ribbon.

1.    Print out your chosen picture.
2.    Cut out the hair part.

3.    Wrap the hair parts around the lint roller (I also used some tape to really get the look I “wanted”).
4.    Add festive ribbon.
5.    Voila! You now have an ornament that says “I printed out pictures of Donald Trump and stuck them onto a lint roller.”

You could also achieve the same effect with your pet’s hair if you have enough of it. Or, you could find some roadkill and attach a festive ribbon to it. However you do it, the end result will be that you didn’t spend $36 on a ball of hair, and that to me, is the very essence of what the holidays are all about.

32 thoughts on “Christmas Craft: Humane Rat’s Nest Ornament”

  1. Wow! That Donald Trump Hair Lint Roller Ornament just screams festive Christmas decoration!! And so economical, too. Thank you so much, Carrie, for saving me all the money I was about to waste on an authentic chinchilla ornament. You have saved my Christmas!

      1. I don’t think it works to deter deer. You can compost hair though – you know, after you’re done making ornaments out of it.

  2. Find some roadkill and attach a ribbon….bahahaha! It’s frightening to think that my 16 year old would get the biggest kick from such a gift! You’re hilarious! I am laughing out loud as I type!

  3. And to think that I just cleaned out our hairbrushes and threw the hair *away*! Oh well, I can always hope that one of the cats yaks up a good hairball soon. I haven’t glittered them, but two of them chew on the tree regularly so I have a good chance of getting some festive faux fir needles in the mix.

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