I get e-mails from Zulily all the time. Zulily is “daily deals for moms, babies, and kids.” I’ve bought stuff for my niece and nephews from them and they also have sales on non-children/mom type stuff but I find it more fun to imagine that all of the merchandise is for kids. Today they are having a sale on rustic decor, and here is one of the things you can buy: 
Mom: Oh! I have to show you – we redecorated Billy’s room!
Houseguest: Ok, great….what’s that hanging from the ceiling?
Mom: Oh, it’s a hook. I got it for sale at a great price. Billy likes to hang his stuffed animals from it. I’ve told him if he pokes a hole in one more teddy bear he doesn’t get to have any more. 
P.S. You can get this fabulous costume for your little one here.
What. The. Hell. A “curated oasis” for psychopaths and serial killers perhaps!
“Curated Oasis” would be a great name for a horror movie.
“Billy, where is your sister?”
“We were just playing Snidely Whiplash and Nell, but we didn’t have train tracks so I used my other toys…”
HA! I would hate to be Billy’s sister.
What did teddy bears ever do to Billy?! *sob*
Everyone needs an M.O. – sometimes the teddy bear has to get it.
I’m not a big fan of conversations, so I think this meat hook isn’t for me.
I feel the same way – “conversation starter” is not a selling point for me.
For the burgeoning psycho in your home . . . great for practice on small animals AND small children!
I don’t know why they don’t mention that in the description.
It’s probably bad that my son would squeal with glee if I got his this, isn’t it?
“Him,” even.
Nah, it depends on what he’d do with it, of course.
Little Dexter will be so happy… Hey… Where’s the cat?
Little Dexter moved past teddy bears reaaaaalll fast.
Why do you think the meat hook isn’t eligible for return?
Because they know how it would be used.