Facts I Made Up About Scary Movies

– Hannibal Lecter was going to be called “The Psychiatrist Who Kills His Patients and Then Eats Them” or “The PWKHPTET Killer” until some astute person pointed out to Thomas Harris that “Cannibal” rhymes with “Hannibal.”

– The sequel to Rosemary’s Baby was going to be about Rosemary’s baby’s preschool years, but since it was mostly going to be boring scenes of Rosemary’s baby in time-out, they scrapped those plans.

– Friday the 13th is based on true events – one time some teenager smooched.

– The Exorcist is based on true events – one time there was a priest.

– Halloween is based on true events – there’s Halloween.

– George Romero has made 9 zombie movies: Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Land of the Dead, Diary of the Dead, Survival of the Dead, Afternoon Tea with the Dead, Looking at Paint Chips for the Living Room of the Dead, and Gravy Train of the Dead.

– The original Freddy Krueger rhyme was – “One, two, Freddy’s comin’ for you/three, four, when he sleeps he snores/five, six, route 66/seven, eight, better clean your plate/nine, ten, what were we talkin’ ’bout, again?”

– There’s  never been a movie about a nightmarish killer who murders you while you’re on the toilet because the inevitable pee-pee dances would take away from the suspense and terror of trying not to use the bathroom.

– The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari has nothing but expired medication in it. He was a very bad doctor.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

14 thoughts on “Facts I Made Up About Scary Movies”

  1. The first draft of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre had Leatherface and his family meeting with a therapist. The working title was Texas Chainsaw Sessions.

    Janet Leigh only stopped at The Bates Motel in Psycho because Motel 6 forgot to leave the light on for her.

  2. The killer from the Halloween movies went on to a successful comedic career highlighted by creating a series of movies about a 60’s British secret agent who finds himself in modern times. Of course then we all know that Michael Myers from Saturday Live stole his idea and made the movies himself for a huge success.

  3. I’m not one for scary movies. Nightmares. And I’ll leave it at that, but I think I would take the time to see “Looking at Paint Chips for the Living Room of the Dead” as it sounds far more decoratey than guts everywhere. And really, who doesn’t want to help a zombie redo their living room? Anything to get away from that ghastly blood red splattered grey! So last century!

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