Disney survey from the Future! The roast futurebeast was delicious, thank you for asking.

Disney sent me a survey about my experience during a trip I will take in June of 2015. I’m not clairvoyant like Disney apparently is, so I did my best to give them the feedback they wanted.

1. Your overall experience and value: It was glurptastic (projected 2015 lingo for “fun”)!

2. Your experience with the rides, shows, attractions, and entertainment: The Carousel of Progress is terribly out of date. There’s not a single mention of the Robotic Revolution in May 2013.

3. Your experience with the characters: Overall, I would say it was nice. However, Mickey Mouse got stuck in “hug mode” and it took them 3 hours to pry me loose.

4. Your experience with the food offered: For the fine dining, the roast futurebeast was delicious. For your quick service establishments, there was much to be desired. I mean, seriously, how long does it take to get a food pill out of the bottle? Quick, my ass.

5. Your experience shopping: The eye scanner nearly blinded me. I’ll just leave it at that.

6. The cast members/employees: All were well-oiled machines and/or properly brainwashed. Kudos.

7. Any special or magical experiences you had: I’d never seen a hover scooter before until now – truly magical. Makes me wish I was fatter.

8. Any challenges or difficulties you encountered: Mission to Actual Mars was great on the way, but once you get there, there’s nothing to do. Bor.ing.

9. Some details about yourself: I live in North Carolina with a vacation home on the moon. I can afford it because I won the lottery. I was also voted Overload of all Dominion – I didn’t even run, it was all write-in votes!

I was expecting a personal call of thanks from an unfrozen Walt Disney from the future, but all I got was an e-mail apologizing for the “error.” Yeah, whatever, Diz, you know I helped. You know it.

16 thoughts on “Disney survey from the Future! The roast futurebeast was delicious, thank you for asking.”

  1. Whoa, back up. You have your vacations planned all the way through 2015? That is awesome. Can you please come organize my life, cause I don’t even know what I’m gonna make for dinner!

  2. We are currently planning a family trip to Disney in the spring of 2012. I have neither the patience nor ingenuity you possess so I will just predict me carrying a lot of crap & being sick of the place by day 2.

    ps…i do like my kids…sometimes

  3. I am so excited about the future robotic revolution! But really fear that the roast futurebeast is going to be way over priced…as is most of Disney’s “food” is now! As overlord of all dominion could you please look into that. Does Mickey do side hugs in the future or is it still full on?

  4. Did you not visit any of the DisneyGov bureaus to see how the Imagineer-gressmen were ruling the county under your benevolent direction?
    Or was it just not on the survey?

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