Five Minute Movies 3: The Return of Five Minute Movies It’s amazing how one little thought, idea, or action could have seriously shortened some movies and solved most of the characters’ problems. Examples: Misery The Game Fatal Attraction Jurassic Park Seven Related posts: Five Minute Movies Five Minute Movies 2: Five Minute Movier To the Person Who Left the Helpful Tip on a Napkin Under My Windshield Wiper
22 thoughts on “Five Minute Movies 3: The Return of Five Minute Movies”
First one had me laughing out loud.
And if he just went and got the new umbrella, where would I get a batch of delicious rabbit stew? mmm….
That poor, poor rabbit.
Giant sloths is the best idea I’ve ever heard for a movie. Do it.
Ok, but I move at a giant sloths pace, so it’ll be a while.
Applebee’s gift card! Life lesson aside, that’s an awesome gift. All things considered, a Mustang is always an inappropriate choice of vehicle for driving in the snow.
Yeah, James Caan was doomed from the start. He really doesn’t last long in that car.
The Game one is perfect. Honestly, give me cash or an Applebees card, not try to ruin my life for sports. I have some more:
The Runaways – “You know this Kim Fowley guy’s creepy and I’ve got a math test in the morning. Let’s go home.”
The Dark Knight – “Dude I’ve got billions. I’m buying an island and getting away from these Jokers.”
Leaving Las Vegas – “Hi, my name is Ben, and I really am an alcoholic.”
Lance, I always love your additions!
Have I told you how much I love your 5-minute movies? Well I do. I love ’em!
A GC to Applebee’s would make it an ever MORE horrifying movie!! Ahhhhhhh!!!
I think a movie about Michael Douglas eating at Applebee’s would be hilarious.
Put the giant sloths IN Applebees and I think you’re really on to something. I love these. More please. The end.
This makes me want to watch The Game now just so I can laugh my ass off afterwards at your reference.
The movie is someone who hates surprises’ worst nightmare.
Aliens – “Let’s listen to Ripley and take a step back here and really think about what we are doing before this gets out of hand.”
Alien 3 – “Let’s listen to Ripley and take a step back here and really think about what we are doing before this gets out of hand.”
Alien: Resurrection – “Let’s listen to Ripley and take a step back here and really think about what we are doing before this gets out of hand.”
And that’s pretty much my five minute movie for “Alien,” as well. If only people would listen to Ripley!
Holy shit do I love these.
All of them, but mostly the first one. “Misery” is the reason why I start to sweat/feel nauseous whenever I hear a word that sounds even remotely like “hobble”.
Yeah, “hobbling along” sounds much more sinister if it’s someone actually wandering around hobbling people.
LOL I love the last one!