Super Friends Season 2, Episode 7, Storyline D – “Time Rescue”
Original Airdate – December 10, 1977
Short Synopsis: Guess what TIME it is!? Yes, it’s another installment of “The Super Friends Attempt a Time Travel Story.”
“On the outskirts of Metropolis, at the Comstock (?) Research Institute, an incredible experiment is about to take place.” – Narrator
“This is a great day for science, Dr. Lao! My time machine is finally ready, and I will be it’s first test subject!” – Professor Comstock
“My time machine is finally ready” roughly translates to “get ready for a heaping pile of dog turds” from Superfriendese.
Professor Comstock sashays into his time machine and demands Dr. Lao “prepare the electron stimulizor” and to “activate the time thrusters,” which Dr. Lao does. I’ve cut through all the technical jargon and created this comparison to help you understand how it works:
Here’s Professor Comstock in the future looking like he’s about to break into song but he didn’t and that was a disappointment.
Behind that rock are some hooded creatures ominously watching this man not break into song and dance.
Dr. Lao tries to return Professor Comstock to the present day but fails. This is a job for the Super Friends (said as unenthusiastically as possible by me).
Here We Go
Superman, Hawkman, and Hawkgirl show up at the Institute and are sent to the future to save the Professor. They are told by Dr. Lao they have one hour to retrieve the Professor and get back to the time travel bus stop.
The trio arrive in the future and yet again the creatures are watching. They look like they all just got out of the shower with their little purple robes (they look like what would result if a Jawa and a Chubbles doll mated):
The trio head on to the city in the distance, where they find what used to be Metropolis. Some things have changed: the world is now inhabited by all sorts of intelligent life forms; some things haven’t: people still sit around drinking coffee in hipster cafes.
Somehow Hawkgirl, Superman, and Hawkman get a table right away – that’s the most unrealistic thing so far, look how crowded it is! They ask their waitress if she’s seen Comstock.
She tells them she hasn’t seen him, then they see one of the so fresh and so clean creatures spying on them. They corner him and demand answers! He tells them the “desert slavers,” which I guess is what the purple robes are called, are holding the Professor “in the Jobo Desert to the North.”
At the Jobo Desert camp, the desert slavers are gathered around a fire, presumably telling each other horror stories.
Because this is only a seven minute story, the slavers are easily overcome with a dust storm Superman creates and they rescue the Professor and make it back safely to the groovin’ 70s.
Health Segment
There was a health segment but it was just Aquaman swimming up to some girl who tells him she’s passed the physical fitness exam, then lists types of exercises. Then he reminds her about swimming, because that’s all he knows.
P.S. I’m posting Super Friends outtakes on the Cannibalistic Nerd Facebook page. So, if you need a mid-week Super Friends pick-me-up, that’s the place to get it.
If you would like to see these shenanigans for yourself, Season 2 is available on DVD.
It is important to always make yourself the first test subject of any technology that involves scattering the atoms of a living being, bending the fabric of time-space, etc.
Oh yes, if Super Friends has taught us anything, it’s that if you invent something, you better rush to be test subject number one – IT ALWAYS WORKS OUT FINE.
Is it just me or does Hawkman have bigger boobs than Hawkgirl? Maybe if she was Hawkwoman, then she could compete with wonder woman in cup size?
Desert slavers make kick ass smores. Don’t ask me how I know.
Hawkman certainly wins in the boob display arena.
Is it just me, or do the creatures the slavers ride look disturbingly similar to Tauntauns? And if that is the case, can the Super Friends sue George Lucas? Because this episode came out a full three years before “Empire” hit the theatres.
They DO look like tauntauns! And the slavers look like Jawas, but that’s the same year as this episode.
I guess the bigger question is, if they are similar to Tauntauns, why didn’t Superman slice one open and shove big boobied Hawkman inside?
Quick joke- how warm is the inside of a Tauntaun?
Luke warm.
They just didn’t have time. Although it would have spiced up the story.
“Yes, yes, Aquaman. Swimming. Swimming’s THE FUCKING BEST. Geez… what a one trick pony.”
-said everyone who ever encountered Aquaman
I bet he brags that his skin doesn’t get pruned, either.
I gotta give the animators some credit in this one: look at those lamps behind the waitress in the hawkpeople screen shot. Those are some find looking lamps right there. Don’t they look real?? I’m kinda mesmerized by them.
Wow, yes, they do look real. I’ll have to go back and look at them again. That is really strange.
Here’s a little time machine invention tip. When conducting the first test run of your time machine start small. Pick maybe an hour into the future or something manageable. Starting with 2000 years into the future runs the risk of having you end up in a time where the Earth is no longer habitable or perhaps ruled by Jawas in purple robes.
Hmmm, there didn’t seem to be a place to enter the time but he could have at least only jumped ahead a year.