Who remembers those plastic chain-link necklaces from the 1980s? The ones you would get charms for from a vending machine to add to the necklace. If you’re my age and a girl you probably had one. You’d go back to the grocery or drug store, again and again, scratching yourself like a crackhead (probably from the plastic against your skin), holding a quarter, looking for your next fix – a charm in the shape of a frying pan, for example. Then you’d add the charm to your necklace, more and more until you looked like Mr. T but instead of gold chains it was little plastic tennis rackets and lipstick and baby bottles and records.
The ones I had were sent to outgrown toy heaven by my mom at some point, but that has never deterred me. I just went to eBay and bought me some new ones several years ago.
Every single charm had a little bell on it, which means there would be no sneaking up on anyone when you were wearing them. And they came in every random item little girls loved!
1. Tennis racket and little shoes 2. lipstick 3. rape whistle 4. PINK baby bottle for future teen moms of girls 5. something called a “record” 6. something called a “typewriter” 7. sunglasses 8. ping pong paddle 9. choo choo train 10. ballerina slipper 11. corn on the cob (of course) 12. a red football 13. a wrench for all the handygirls out there 14. a ball-peen hammer (forget that claw hammer bullshit – those are for boys!) 15. sausage (aww yeah) 16. uh, a half-eaten fish carcass 17. an adorable turquoise ax for all the little Lizzie Bordens out there.
1. toothpaste (as Crest tells me now with their commercials, a lady needs her some non-yellow teeth if she wants to attract a husband!) 2. little yellow lion 3. a heart – girls love hearts! 4. a PINK baseball and 5. PINK baseball bat 6. white elephant 7. a translucent aqua bulldog (probably created after unrelenting demand from 1980s kids) 8. football 9. the word “happy,” it’s just important to be reminded how to feel 10. a bathtub (no dirty girls!) 11. a BLUE baby bottle for future teen moms of boys 12. a comb for lice, I’m assuming 13. a horseshoe and….14. the things that little girls love the most in all the world.
A blue googly-eyed lady thing wearing a bra over a shirt with a misshapen left foot. SO RAD!
I think my favorite charm, which I don’t own, is the mutli-colored abacus. One day I’ll get my hands on one, and then I can finally do some math!
Who remembers these or had one?