Famous Last Thoughts

Over this past weekend, I was visiting my mom and sister in North Carolina. It was a relatively quick trip, just Friday-Sunday. I had already completely fucked up the extremely basic math of packing:

Friday + Saturday + Sunday + Monday = 2 whole days there = 2 changes of clothes.

That is incorrect. The correct answer is 3 changes of clothes. I am really, really bad at math.

I usually always leave something there when I return home. Mostly it’s clothing. Sometimes it’s a phone charger, or my keys, or the camera. One time, it was a pair of sandals that smell like sweaty ass-foot, so it was really more an act of cruelty to my mom than an inconvenience to me.

This time, I really didn’t bring that much, and as I loaded my car, I took mental inventory:

“Ok, I have my phone, it’s charger, my e-reader, the camera, my laptop, my keys, toiletries, clothes…well, if I do leave anything, it won’t be too important, because I have all the essentials. If I leave anything, it won’t matter, I’ll get it next time I’m up.”

I left my laptop’s power cord. And, just to be sure I really screwed myself over, I ran the battery down to nothing the night before. I failed to heed the words of Journey, “be good to yourself, when nobody else will.”

My mom said she’d try to send me my cord today. Until then, I’m stuck** with Tom’s MacBook, old-lady-complaining about how I don’t know how anything works and my bunions are killing me, even though I don’t even have any bunions.

So, I’m going to take a break, soak this MacBook on warm salt water, and hopefully that will make everything better again.

**incredibly spoiled


20 thoughts on “Famous Last Thoughts”

  1. I’ll keep you in my thoughts during this dark time of need, but only the good thoughts. Not the ones I have 99 percent of the workday that involve a hostile takeover with office supplies simply so I can go home.

  2. You should create an extensive checklist for yourself for each to time you visit and return, and have your mom double check it and sign off on it when it’s time to leave.

  3. I hear epsom salts are good for that. Or is that an Aveeno oatmeal bath. Eh, I get all my bath time treatments confused. Maybe just a nice sponge bath will do the trick. And you might wanna tell those kids to get off your lawn and turn down their dagblammit music while you are at it.

  4. This reminds me of the last California trip I took for business… the one where I remembered to take my (annoyingly heavy) laptop, but not my laptop charger. Nice. And did I mention that the battery in my laptop doesn’t hold a charge any more? So it pretty much was a lost cause. ;-P I had to scrounge around the office for workstations to steal when people were away from their desks for more than 5 minutes.

  5. if it’s a Macbook then you deserve a break today.

    That’s a McDonald’s reference and proff I’m your lamest friends.

    My thoughts are with you during this tough time *cough*

  6. That’s awful! When the warm salt water soak is over, see if there’s an app for remembring power cords and another for those bunions. If not, call shenanigans on Apple and sue them for $100M. Misrepresntation of their products. That’s like $5 to you or me.

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