Author: Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd

Super Friends Season 2, Episode 9, Storyline B – “Game of Chicken”

Original Airdate – October 29, 1977

Short Synopsis: At Al’s Drive-In, two cars vie for the same parking space. “Out of my way, Mill,” exclaims Lans. Mill and Lans are the names I heard, so I’m going with it.

Lans says he always parks there, and then Mill says he has the muscles to back up his claim. Oh my god it’s already so boring. Mill tells Lans, “You wouldn’t be so brave if you didn’t have muscles!” Ok, well, yeah, that kind of stands to reason.

Mill then proposes a game of chicken, “unless of course, YOU’RE chicken!” Snap. Wow, both of these guys seem like real gentlemen. Mill proposes having this game of chicken in what I swear is “in my dad’s boots,” but that can’t be right.

And I guess the guy’s name could be “Lance” but that’s NOT how they’re saying it. I’m getting off track (ha ha! like in a game of chicken!).

The Wonder Twins are bowling, because that’s the only thing that can be more boring than The Wonder Twins. The Wonder Twins bowling.

Jayna says that “bowling is right up Gleek’s alley,” and just when I was about to go stick my head in the oven, the Twins get the Trouble Alert.

Ohhhh, BOATS, not Boots.

Mill and Lans race each other along a mountain road on the way to a marina, and they’re having a complete back-and-forth conversation over their roaring engines (bunch of trash talk).

But who’s there to stop them? Jayna, Zan, and Gleek, who’s grown like a foot and a half.

Those two dummies stop their cars, and Jayna and Zan tell them surely there’s some other, safer way to resolve their issues.

“Why suuuure, we’ll shake hands and make up,” says one of them (I can’t keep track), dripping with sarcasm.

“Good!” says naive and stupid Zan.

“AFTER I cream him on the river!” clarifies that one guy. And then, he does this:

I take everything bad back I said about him. We’re to be married in the spring.

Then the Wonder Twins have to do their little power move covered in mud to rush to aid the jerks who did this to them.

And here’s those boots boats everyone’s been talking about.

So the guys finally make it to their boats. One does indeed chicken out (the smart one, I guess), and then the other one’s “steering cable” breaks and he is helplessly careening towards a waterfall.

And then this is how they save him?

Pretty self explanatory. Zan became and ice ramp and then Jayna became a walrus to the stop the boat by hitching her back flippers into the boat and then digging her walrus tusks into her own brother. Really, it’s what any of us would have done.

If you would like to see these shenanigans for yourself, Season 2 is available on DVD.

It’s been a couple of weeks, I know. And it’s high time I do a new installment of Super Friends. Buuuut – it’s the holidays, and to really give it the attention it deserves (I can’t believe I just wrote that), I’m going to hold off one more week before we dive into another storyline.

So, this week it’s a quick trip through the safety segment.

Two kids race down a hill on their bikes. They stop and the girl says, “I WIN! Let’s do it again, this time with no hands!”

Batman and Robin drive up in the Batmobile. Off-road. They just pull up in their car on the freshly mowed grass like the world is their pavement. To teach a lesson about safety.

 

The kids then ask Batman and Robin if they want to watch them race down the hill using no hands, and Robin asks, “Hey, isn’t that dangerous?” Well, Robin, if you guys don’t know…

“The only thing showing off does is give you a chance to get hurt,” Batman condescends. The kids say they hadn’t thought about that and then Batman and Robin head out WAIT A SECOND WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?

 

A fucking road appears out of nowhere to try and make Batman and Robin look less like the jackasses we all know they are.

And look! They obviously stole those children’s bikes, too. Sure, Batman, all in the name of safety, asshole.

If you would like to see these shenanigans for yourself, Season 2 is available on DVD.